Plumbing new depths

All too often, most of us like to brag about our achievements: a posh house, a new luxury car, an exotic overseas vacation, an academic distinction, a significant social success, and oh, so many others. What we never like to dwell upon is our role in destroying the planet, our refusal to foster community development, our unconcern regarding moral and ethical standards. We, in India, have the abundant blessings of Mother Earth, but if there were a survey regarding civic and honourable matters, our country is sure to be lurking at the bottom of the list.

It is said that the media—film, television, the news, word-of-mouth, whatever—caters only to what the establishment thinks the public wants. Take the movies, for instance. The box office is surfeit with so-called “action” cinema. Right from the days of Sholay—and before that, too, surely—violence is glorified. I remember the actress being made to prance about (not dance) on pieces of glass, perhaps to satisfy the viewers’ lust for blood. Today we have Indian, Pushpa, Thug Life, and so many irresponsible movies flooding the market, just to follow the mantra: “give the people what they want”. Such cinema seems to do well, for the producers, the director and the lead cast, but at what cost?

The descent into indecency is just one step away. All of us know the answer to the question asked in a hit song: “choli ke peeche kya hai”, but the debate went up to the Houses of Parliament! A snide, sexist remark wanted to know if there were a “male” sequel to the lyrics, the words going something like: Langoot ke neeche kya hai”. Then, of course, there was the Tamil song that I can only translate, roughly: “Last night, baby, sleep took flight, baby”. Gone forever are the days when man-boy chased girl, this romance flowering into a shot of two roses kissing, or a drone chasing the queen-bee. Fortunately—thus far—the movie-men have not gone the distance—a dog relentless in its pursuit, followed by the pack waiting for their turn.

Let’s move to the “idiot box”. Advertisers are not averse to adding a little (or lot of) “masala” to their punch lines, but, by and large, decency—or what, in modern times, we think of the same—is maintained. But when the media thinks not too rosily about the audience, they tend to slip in some smut. Some weeks ago, there was an ad about a bunch of buccaneer-looking businessmen receiving a phone call from their boss. “Holy ship”, one of them exclaims, but the audience already knows that he means something else. Nowadays, there is presentation by WINT, which doesn’t mince words at all. The young oaf in question, revels in his vocabulary so much that he bobs his head up and down right to the end of the ad, not dissimilar to a jumping jackass.

But the one that has caught my attention is the one for “Puro Salt”. The ad features a group of presentable, even pretty, young women, discussing the winning qualities of the salt in question. The main character reaffirms her perspicacity by deeming “Puro” salt to be healthy. Fortunately, the conversation is in Hindi (mainly), with a smattering of English words interspersed. I am here assuming that the word “healthy” is the one thought to be English. I do not know if there is a Hindi word with the same kind of pronunciation. But there is no such word in English, given the way the young thing pronounces it. In fact, there are very few words, in English, that end with “—lthy”. There is “healthy” and its opposite “unhealthy”; there is “stealthy”, there is “wealthy”, and finally, fittingly in the context, there is “filthy”. The noun forms of all these words end with “lth” and all of them are pronounced the same—with the “th” ending. It is an abomination to pronounce these words as if they ended “—elthy”, or, more closely “—eldy”. Think about it, even filth would become fildy. “Ha”.

In the 18th century, the English language was undergoing so many changes that even the great Samuel Johnson was horrified. One area of concern then was the changing pronunciation of even ordinary words. Dr Johnson remonstrated. He bellowed: I cannot find it in my mind to call it wind”. Simple enough, but the words he actually said demonstrated his exasperation. He said [phonetics mine]: I cannot finned it in my minned to call it winned”. I hope the guys and gals honing our sensibilities will take note. You may take English out of context, but you shouldn’t take the context out of English.

Now for some trivia. In 1895, George Goschen became First Lord of the Admiralty, in England. He was a well-known businessman, and was credited with great improvements to the British fleet. Somehow, one disgruntled (perhaps) parliamentarian had his say. Why, I do not know? But this is what he said: “Lord Goschen has no notion about the motion of the ocean.” And yet the First Lord was what he was!

One more anecdote and I’m done. The flamboyant Oscar Wilde, on returning to England from a trip overseas, was asked by a Customs officer: “Do you have anything to declare?” “Nothing”, said Wilde, nonchalantly, “but my genius”.

So, there. Don’t say I didn’t tell you.